Crocheting a dream

First, I'll start off saying that it's my belief that God speaks through dreams. Not every dream is from God, but those dreams from Him are there.

I'm quite a dreamer. I try to remember to write them down and see what God (if it's from Him) is saying to me.

Let me also interject here that I have been praying and asking God to help me design my own crochet projects. There are a TON of wonderful crochet patterns out there, but along the way, in this funky world of design, some of these designers got the message to tell others who use their patterns that they are NOT to sell items made with their patterns. Frankly, I think that's a bit snobbish of them. Do they seriously think they'd be able to fill all those orders? No, I think they don't want someone else making a profit using their pattern. As this whole electronic/internet age widens out and I read more about what others are doing, it just saddens me. Before I purchase patterns, I read what the designers do not want you to do with their patterns. If they do not want finished products sold, I refuse to purchase their patterns. I will gladly lay out money for patterns, just not for those. Trust me, I can be snobbish right back.

Where was I? Ok, so in light of all that, I thought it would just be easier if I could make up my stuff from my own pattern and had been asking God for help. See, I don't want to take the time to do the designing. I want to go straight to the crocheting. I admire and appreciate the work that goes into designing crochet patterns. That's why I don't mind paying for them. But I thought, hey, maybe God will give me something in my dreams. I won't know unless I ask. And I believe that when I ask, He will answer in some way.

I had dreamed about crochet 2 other times that I can remember. But I didn't follow through with crocheting them out because I was too intimidated. I'm a perfectionist and was afraid of messing it up or not getting it right. I think if I had just simply worked them up the next day, He would have blessed my work and I would be getting better at this. I did write those dreams down, but since I cannot draw, those images are lost. :(

2 nights ago, however, I was crocheting in my dream. The focus was on the work I was doing at one point, but for the most part, even though I was walking around crocheting, the focus was on other parts of the dream.

I wrote the dream down, and wrote down as much detail of the crochet as I could remember. The piece made no sense to me and I didn't know what it was. I had some other things I wanted to finish yesterday, so I put the dream crochet on the back burner, periodically thinking about that dream, wondering if I'd try it out. It was a bit simpler than the others I had dreamed, but there was still that fear there. How do I start it out? What if I don't get the pattern exact? And just what the heck is it? Yes, I was saying "what the heck is it?" to God. Like He doesn't know my thoughts anyway... :)

On Friday nights we go to church. Our church started having a Friday night service years ago. It was strange, at first, going to church on a Friday night, but now I cannot imagine doing anything else. The kids and I get there about an hour and a half before church starts. I brought along the yarn I used in my dream and began. I was going to start with a swatch because that's what you do, right? Well, how many designers get patterns from God in their dreams? I'm sure some of them do, but I think I'm skipping that swatch stage (yay!). So, the swatch didn't work out as I didn't know how to work a swatch for this particular piece. I just dove right in. It was funny. As people came in, they asked what I was making. I said, "I don't know. I'm crocheting a dream." I still don't know what it's going to be and I don't know if it will BE anything. I think God was saying, "You asked for a pattern. I gave you one. Now, are YOU going to do anything with it? If you do, I will give you more." So, against every fiber of my being, I will complete this. Why is it so hard? Because I don't know it's purpose. It's hard enough to walk by faith, but crochet by faith? And the fact that this is so difficult for me shows me it's from God. My flesh screaming out in rebellion is a good indicator.

We shall see what transpires.